Dear Audubon Society,

     I write with a heavy heart today. I must turn in my pointer puppy because she has caused the demise of a little dove in our backyard. Because the dove is a game bird she is in violation of A.S. S. (Audubon Society Sillyness) rule number 2645-PH12. I am so ashamed of her actions. She knows very well that dove season is not until September but was overcome by temptation. To make matters worse the pup plucked the poor creature and delivered it proudly to my hand.

     I trust that you will be able to train her to not be so opportunistic and the proper use of salt and pepper after plucking. Please accept my enclosed donation for you’re worthy program.  I know that there is no better way for you to spend your member’s money than to address the rampant ravages of domestic cats (in this case, dogs) on the wild game birds of America.

Very Sincerely Yours,

Linda Dightmon

Team AZOD